Grief, Loss, Starting Over
Summer is a time we associate with fun, laughter and lazy summer days. It is also a time for special occasions and invitations. But if you suffer a loss or are grieving maybe all you want to do is hide. To help you get through, here are 6 ways to cope with grief during summer.
You many dread the idea of participating in any events or summer activities. Or at a minimum you may feel anxiety creeping up, and you worry how you will cope.
Anxiety and anticipation leading up to summer and holidays can be more intense than the actual events. When we experience grief, it takes a real physical, emotional and physiological toll. With a little planning ahead it is possible to reduce feelings of anxiety and incredible stress for anyone grieving a death loss.
When you have suffered the trauma of loss due to death, a little planning can help to cope in the summer holidays.
Here are some ideas to help you and your loved ones cope during Summer and its many celebrations.
When you are grieving it’s important to set boundaries. People mean well and will want to include you in events. But only you really know how you feel in times of grief. One way to cope with grief in busy summer holidays is to set boundaries. If if you are not ready to do something then it is okay to say no. Setting boundaries is helpful to ease the pressure when you are coping with grief.
Summer is full of events like weddings, picnics and other social events. If you suffer a loss then certain events may trigger memories (some good and some upsetting). And sometimes you are just not ready to attend certain events or occasions. So if you receive an invitation it’s okay to find out more. As planning can make the difference of how you will cope (or decline) the occasion.
Find out who will be there, how long it will last, and if there there is anything to prepare for it. Or maybe you will want to avoid it altogether. It is OK to avoid people and events that will trigger unpleasant emotions.
You may not be able to do everything you’ve always done. Grief can make us feel tired, sad and feel anything but being social. Take note of the activities that feel good and those that don’t. And know its okay to scale back or change something you may have done in the past. Death affects each person differently. So it’s important to notice and accept limitations (until you are ready to move forward again).
Grieving a loss is already draining. And summertime can add extra physical and emotional tolls due to hot weather and extra activities. Take time for self care – get extra rest, stay cool and keep hydrated. And try to be gentle on yourself as you cope with grief in the busy summer time.
One of the ways to survive grief during the summer holidays is to create new habits or rituals. This can be as simple as doing acts of self care. Begin journaling, or a start a new hobby such as planting a small garden (or something that is a healthy way to keep your mind and body active).
Summer is full of memories we share with others. To help in this time of grief consider recreating memories of summer or do something in memory of the one you are grieving.
Plant a tree, some flowers, or make a cool meditation space where you can sit and reflect. Another way is to give back in their memory. Volunteer, or donate to an animal shelter or to something that was once important to them.
Or make something you enjoyed together, like a nice meal, and a glass of wine.
No matter what the season you are grieving a loss will have its challenges. Summer often brings extra heat, extra occasions which can be taxing at any time. So be gentle on yourself, know your limitations and know that it is okay to say no will are just a few of the ways to survive grief during the summer months.
In this time of healing if you would like support texts or to buy a gift for a grieving friend visit the Grief Coach – a supportive text app.
