Crying Helps The Grief Process
Crying is a unique emotional response that varies from person to person. When it comes to grief, loss and traumatic events crying helps the grief process. There are some of us who are emotional basket cases who cry when we are happy or sad. Others are the stoic type, we’ll do anything to hide the tears. And we deal with hurt and sadness in every way possible except shedding a tear.
In the same way that crying is a perfectly acceptable response when experiencing grief, the absence of it by no means signifies that someone is not truly hurt.
If you are currently experiencing grief, or when you inevitably do go through the experience, it is important to understand the crying helps the grief process. It’s a very beneficial part of the healing process.
In this article we talk about grief and some of the reasons to let yourself shed a tear when and if you need to do so.
Tears Are Emotional Tension Manifested
Any strong emotion, such as grief, almost allows causes a significant buildup of tension and frustration in the mind. While you may tell yourself any number of reasons why suppressing these emotions is the right thing to do, in reality, this does far more harm than good. During the grieving process, allowing yourself to have some sort of release from this tension goes along way in moving one step closer to healing.
How Crying Helps The Grief Process
The actual manner in which you release these emotions can happen in a number of ways. Maybe punching your mattress, venting to a loved one for hours on end or crying is what works for you. As long as your outlet does harm you or someone else, the way you ease your tension is not important, what IS important is that you do.
For many people, tears serve as a physical manifestation of all the hurt and pain they are feeling inside leaving their internal environment. As each teardrop falls, the pressure they have been experiencing slowly begins to subside.
Is it Okay to Cry In Front of People When Grieving
Not only is it okay to cry when your with others but it is normal. That doesn’t mean we feel okay with crying. During the grieving process, we tend to feel extremely vulnerable. It’s a scary experience for a lot of people, as vulnerability is far from an easy emotion to express.
However, letting yourself cry in front of those closest to you can be extremely beneficial. By doing so, you are allowing yourself to feel safe, and you’re not keeping these feeling pent up for when you are alone.
What If You Can’t Cry Around People
Choking back the tears is a response that many people. There is shame and embarrassment when it comes to crying in front of other people when grieving or for other reasons. It’s alright to excuse yourself if you feel the need.
But holding back tear too often may lead to not being able to process your grief. Be gentle on yourself and know that you will not always be teary nor breaking down.
When we are experiencing this type of sadness and pain, what we really want is to feel like our emotions are validated, especially by someone else. This is why allowing yourself to cry in front of someone who loves and cares about you can be so beneficial.
By doing this, you are creating an atmosphere of safety and understanding in the presence of someone who can and will validate how you are feeling in a nonjudgmental way.
Is Crying Due To Grief Good
While it may seem odd, there is actually research that reports that our tears have a different composition during times of grief. These tears that come with crying that helps the grief process and healing process.
In his book, Crying: The Mystery Of Tears, Dr. William Frey explains how that normal reflex tears, such as when you laugh a lot or get something caught in your eye, are almost entirely made up of water. Emotional tears, however, actually contain the stress hormones and toxins that buildup up during emotions such as grief.
Furthermore, this response also triggers the body to release endorphins, often referred to as “feel good” hormones.
Literally, when you allow yourself to cry during the grieving process, you are not only releasing all of the unwanted hormones that have accumulated, you are also ramping up the biological agents responsible for improving your mood!
Works Cited
Frey, W. H., & Langseth, M. (1985). Crying: the mystery of tears. Minneapolis, MN: Winston Press.
